


Bittersweet Memories

by franklyromantic



Category: Fantastic Four, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Amazing Spider-Man (Movies - Webb)
Genre: Actor!Johnny, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Breaking Up & Making Up, M/M, he regrets things, i wrote this in like 2 hours but i like it, peter thinks back to when they dated, spideytorch - Freeform, started from a tumblr prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-14
Updated: 2018-07-14
Packaged: 2019-06-10 11:59:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,852
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15291054
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/franklyromantic/pseuds/franklyromantic
Summary: 'I can't keep kissing strangers and pretending that they're you'Peter thinks back. Back to when he and Johnny dated, back to when everything was great, until he ruined the best thing he ever had because he doesn't like attention.He does hate himself a little bit for that.





	Bittersweet Memories

Sometimes Peter thinks his life would be way easier if he’d never met Johnny Storm.

Sure, he's handsome and kind and sweet, but he was also the rising star of Hollywood - back when Peter got paid for taking a photo of him on the red carpet and the blond seemed to be interested in the awkward paparazzo that, surprisingly, never asked him a single question, not even how he was doing.  
He didn’t want to know about his latest movie, or his sister, the Victoria’s Secret model, who married a broke scientist by the name of Reed Richards. He didn’t even care about Johnny’s sex life, like all the other reporters.

Only then, when Reed invented some sort of ray that made it possible to detect natural disasters, for example hurricanes, WEEKS before the usual gadgets even find the smallest hint of the possibility of it happening, and then helped to efficiently evacuate people from their homes after detecting them, Peter showed interest.

He still remembers that day. They weren’t even on the red carpet, or any other high society meetup, for that matter.  
They were two regular guys in a coffee shop, one without his camera and the other without his bright ‘look at me smile, I’m famous’ smile, and Peter managed to muster up the courage to ask Johnny if he knew what kind of rays Reed had used - the media didn’t seem to agree on anything, these days, and it would be pretty bad if he ended up damaging the entire world with nuclear radiation, wouldn’t it?

He still sees Johnny’s face at that moment, when he closes his eyes and thinks back, when he lets himself remember. He sees the confusion, the question ‘do you know who I am?’ unspoken on his face, and then the amusement, after he had realized that this particular person did, in fact, not give a single shit about his popularity.

It was pretty easy going from then on; their conversation went on for a bit, Peter repeatedly asking questions about his brother-in-law’s inventions, and Johnny trying to explain as much as he could, with his little knowledge in scientific fields.  
He told the actor he’s majoring in chemistry, minoring in biology, and working at the Daily Bugle only to support himself, as an IT guy and a photographer, to which Johnny said that with his looks, he belongs in front of the camera, not behind it.  
He learned about Johnny’s family, about his sister, who is so much more than just a pretty face, who actually studied rocket science herself, but dropped out of college and picked up modeling for financial reasons after their parents died, and to have more time to take care of her little brother.

“I owe everything to her,” he said that day. “I don’t know where I would be without her. Or Reed. Even Ben.”

Ben, he explained, was his security guy, as a part-time job. His ACTUAL job was being absolutely annoyed by everything he did and said.

“It’s almost funny, y’know? There he is, just chilling his life, when his best friend starts dating this model, who brings along the most annoying little gremlin, and then he ends up being security for this jerk.”

Peter laughed, he remembers. He laughed a lot when he was with him.  
He laughed when they parted ways after they had finished their fourth cup of coffee and Johnny asked him for his number, because he thought it was a joke.  
He laughed when he got a text after a movie premiere, asking why he wasn’t there; saying, now there was nothing to look at during interviews, because only he would search for one particular photographer in midst hundreds.  
He laughed when he got a call, late at night, apparently after heavy partying, asking if he wanted to meet up and he laughed even more when Johnny actually showed up at his crappy apartment at 2 AM, with takeout, booze and a smug looking face.

He was still laughing when things got serious, when they were happy, when they introduced each other to their respective families, when everything seemed to be going great.  
It wasn’t until people took photos of them, until the press started picking up on their relationship and Peter learned what it was like to be the face in front of the camera, when he stopped laughing.

He hated the attention.  
He hated it with a burning passion, more than anything else in the world, more than J. Jonah Jameson himself.  
He was sure he’d break some poor reporter’s nose if they didn’t quit being this fucking nosy, spying on all their activities, making up rumors, doing absolutely anything to stir up drama between the two of them, even though he knew all too well what it was like working for the newspaper, or a gossip magazine, even, with the latter being probably even more stressful; having to dig as deep as possible, wasting time and losing sleep to get nothing but one simple article, and even then not being rewarded in the way they deserved.

Still, it was annoying, to the point where he didn’t want to leave the house anymore, because every way he went, every corner he turned, there they were, just waiting like vultures until he did the one thing they could twist and turn and tell the whole world he was cheating on Johnny.

But he loved Johnny, he did, and if he allows himself to think about it, he still does, but no matter how perfect the time they spent together was, he couldn’t bring himself to adapt to his new lifestyle.  
Johnny was perfect, the absolute sweetest, but thinking about the media left a bitter taste in his mouth, like he just bit into a pack of gunpowder and tried to wash it down with acid, and after a few months, he couldn’t take it anymore.

Half a year later, he still can’t go on the internet without being slandered by thousands of fangirls, insulting him, asking how he could ever break up with Johnny, even going as far as sending him legitimate death threats, and he still dreads going outside, in fear of being recognized as ‘the douche that dumped Storm’.  
Not even the people at his college leave him alone. Fucking vultures.

It’s not like it even matters to him, no, he’s able to handle threats and insults, he’s used to it after years of being bullied in high school, but he’d appreciate it if people let him forget about what was possibly the biggest mistake of his life, thank you very much.  
No matter where he goes, the constant reminder of himself letting Johnny go, demanding he leave his apartment and never come back, short of breaking into tears himself, is everywhere.

JOHNNY is everywhere. And damn it if he isn’t about to text him, or call him, leave him a thousand voicemails, strung with apologies and pleas, at every waking second.  
He longs for him, with every fiber of his being, and he knows it. He knows he misses his hugs and his kisses, his fingers playing with his hair while he’s napping on his boyfriend.  
He misses his smiles, and the way his eyes get even more blue when he’s happy, like a lake in sunlight, shimmering and glittering. He misses the sound of his voice, even his crappy singing in the car or in the shower, his stupid made up songs about pancakes and twisted ankles and the way Sue’s hair stand up in every direction in the morning.  
He misses Johnny’s plain existence by his side, when he’s going grocery shopping or watching what feels like the eight-hundredth rerun of Star Trek, but he’s stuck like this now.

Stuck without the man he loves and fully knowing it’s his own fault it has to be like this.  
Stuck not being able to go to the movies or even look at the wrong fucking news site if he doesn’t want to see him making out with people way hotter than Peter himself.  
Stuck with nothing but longing, despair and these bittersweet memories.

Because no matter how bad he feels, he can’t try and contact him. He can’t bring himself to possibly make Johnny feel like he’s toying with his emotions, dumping him and then asking to come back.  
He’d rather stay like this, letting Johnny move on and find someone worthy of his time.

Of course, it’s Jonathan Storm himself who has to ruin that plan.

It’s a completely normal friday night, filled with TV and takeout, until the doorbell rings and Peter silently curses at whoever it is that makes him get up from his spot on the couch.  
It’s a tiny flat, so it doesn’t take long for him to reach the door, a fact he usually appreciates, if it wasn’t for the face he oh so desperately has been trying to avoid for the last couple of months, nervously smiling at him.

And suddenly, he’s frozen.

“Hey, Pete,” Johnny says, and Peter realizes how late it is, that he hasn’t showered in three days and additionally, that he currently isn’t wearing a shirt, and also, that Johnny fucking Storm is standing in front of him with a look on his face that somehow displays thirty different emotions at once.

“Uhh.. hi?” he answers, probably a bit too late, before he’s quiet again.

“Listen, Pete, I know you said not to come back but it’s just.. I don’t even what it is, I couldn’t help myself, I mean it’s.. it’s stupid and I’m sorry and if you want me to leave I will, I promise, but if we didn’t break up, today would be our anniversary, do you know that? Because I do, and I also know that I understand why you ended it, so please know that I’m not mad or anything and wow I’m sure saying ‘know’ a lot right now,” Johnny rambles.

Peter almost has to laugh.

“Anyway, I.. I miss you. I miss everything we had and it sucks, because I know that it’s over, but I can’t bring myself to accept that. Damn it, I love you, okay? So much, and Sue loves you too, even Reed and Ben, and they miss you, too and I really want to talk things out and make up because I can’t stand being without you and I really can’t keep kissing strangers and pretending that they’re you. So.. talking? You okay with that?”

And with no fucks given, he practically throws himself at Johnny, hugging him tightly, and he feels Johnny chuckling, hugging back and then hears him say “I even brought the takeout and booze.”

“I just ate,” Peter replies and Johnny lets go of him, raising an eyebrow.  
“It’s almost as if you weren’t non stop eating.”

“Oh, shut up,” he says, pulling the blonde inside.

To hell with reporters and fans, he thinks. To hell with everyone. He’s got a chance to fix things with Johnny, and to hell with himself, too, if he doesn’t take it.


End file.
